Lawnmowing the White House

Talk about heartwarming stories! This kid, see, a white American boy, writes a letter to the White House how he mows lawns around his neighborhood and boy,howdy, would he ever love to mow the President’s grass. So the president’s staff seizes right on this as a photo op bonanza and invites the lad to come to D.C. and use the official pushmower while Donald walks alongside the 11 year old exclaiming how the entrepreneurial go-getter is the Future of America.

I listened yesterday to the Future of America explain how he was happy his letter would no doubt open up doors for his burgeoning enterprise. The future Warren Buffet wanted to charge his usual $8 but his folks talked him into doing it for free, no doubt a tax write-off. Call me cynical, I guess, because somehow I didn’t care for the idea of turning this into a publicity stunt. Give me a paper boy maybe delivering the dailies door to door. Give me a Kool-Aid stand on the sidewalk of my old neighborhood. But don’t tell me this kid is what I want for the Future of America, some pre-adolescent hustler who probably will, by the time he’s 14, be hiring illegal immigrants for his chain of landscaping services.

Don’t get me wrong. I give the kid some credit for mowing lawns at 11. I do wonder about his folks letting some tyke loose in the hood with a machine capable of chewing through his hundred dollar Nikes right into his barely formed feet. My dad wouldn’t let me near a mower until I was nearly out of high school. Said it was too dangerous for kids. I guess I think he had a point.

Donald, well, I doubt he cares about some kid’s toes. If I were a petty person, I’d ask if the White House filled out a W-2 for the kid, maybe a 1099. But I’m sure the Future of America probably works under the table.

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One Response to “Lawnmowing the White House”

  1. Rick Says:

    Skeeter –
    I think I see where this is REALLY going. First, Trump hires a white boy, for free, to work on the White House grounds. He praises the young man’s entrepreneurial spirit, and his pursuit of free enterprise and the American Way. Then later, Trump can offer the same position to a black person in an effort to show he’s a man of equal opportunity. It’s still unpaid of course, but no one would now dare infer that it smacks of servitude, because mowing the lawn for free is an honor, one already bestowed upon a white person.

    (Trap)

    Then, slowly, one by one, Trump will fill all of the esteemed groundskeeping positions with free black labor and we’ve Made America Great Again! (Dog whistle)

    Just like the founding fathers:
    Presidents Jefferson, Madison, Monroe, Jackson, Tyler, Polk, and Taylor relied on slave labor in the White House. The enslaved persons and families lived in the basement/ground floor of the White House.
    https://www.whitehousehistory.org/press-room/press-fact-sheets/slavery-and-the-white-house

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