The Skeeter Daddle Diaries

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Usually it’s sad to call it quits on a vacation, but … not this trip. If we can make it home without being killed or caught, I will gladly call this a successful trip. Currently we’re parked in the Observation Deck of the Albuquirky Airport a mere 3 hours before our flight, that’s how snakebit we felt after missing our plane on the way down. ‘Better early than never’, isn’t that the expression.

Naturally the temperature here today will finally break past the 40’s and hit 60. We’ll get home to freezing rain. That pretty much sums up the trip, at least from a meteorological standpoint, maybe not the fairest metric. After all, we had plenty of sun to balance out the snow, the wind, the freezing temperatures. It is, after all, winter in the Sunbelt too. Or as my man Trump would crow, ‘Where’s your global warming now, Mr. Daddle?’

And so it’s back to politics as usual in a country run by an imbecile surrounded by sycophants admiring his invisible raiment. For over a week down here that was all left behind, no little relief for us moron-weary travelers, a nice respite from talking heads and apparently the start of a very long 2020 election with so many hats thrown into the ring, it makes my modest collection look paltry. And who knows, maybe I’ll change my mind and throw one of mine in too. It’s like a Demolition Derby, whatever jalopy is still moving after countless bashes and wrecks will be declared the ‘winner’ before being hauled off to some wretched salvage yard, its radiator still steaming and engine oil dripping on a red hot muffler.

D.C. seems a world away from New Mexico, at least in the Outback if not Santa Fe and Albuquerque. We have to go home now and check for frozen pipes. Politics has to take a backseat when the living is hard. And for a lot of New Mexico, the living is hard indeed. Hasta la vista.

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Lately there has been some serious speculation that D.J. Trump has been nominated for the Nobel Peace Prize by Japan’s Prime Minister. Of course mostly it’s a rumor started by Trump himself, but it does give you some insight into the man’s modesty. If it were true, no doubt he would be in fairly serious competition with Assad of Syria and Putin of Russia, but as you know by now from repetitious self-advertising, the man is a Winner, a legend in his own mind.

Why not? We live in a topsy-turvy world now and if you think the Peace Prize is out of his reach, think again. After all, he stopped that imminent war with North Korea he threatened to start. And if the planet isn’t safer after pulling out of the Iran Treaty, he doubled down by pulling out of the IMF missile treaty too. His automaton Vice President just boasted to the Europeans that because D.J. was bullying them into paying more for NATO, it made him the Leader of the Free World. So what if nobody applauded. At least they didn’t laugh.

Me, I’m expecting an announcement any day that D.J. was also nominated for the Physics Prize. The Stockholm committee will reason that anyone who can call into question the laws of science must be a force to be reckoned with. And while they’re at it, maybe nominate him for the Literature Prize for elevating the Tweet to an artform for generations to come. Wouldn’t surprise me either if they awarded him the prize for Economics too, a leader who took the voodoo out of economics and brought zombie finance back to life, waging tariff wars and renegotiating existing pacts and returning us to nationalism when the rest of the world is recklessly moving toward globalism.

While they’re at it, maybe they’ll rethink the name, Nobel Prize. Trump Prize. Has a nice ring to it. And instead of handing out the awards, maybe they could have the nominees compete, then one by one, be eliminated. A little more interesting than just handing out the medals, don’tcha think? Plus, the advertising revenues would be huge. Might have to add a few categories to hold public interest, but it’s about time to freshen up a stale contest. Prize in Demagoguery is my pick. And I have someone in mind already. The rest are fired!

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