The Skeeter Daddle Diaries

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By now you’ve guessed we live in a banana republic run by thugs and mobsters. Maybe you’re like me, slightly shocked at the revelation our Leader doesn’t give a damn about the country, just his bottom line. Or maybe you think the folks attacking the Cohen testimony without once making even a vague attempt to counter corroborating evidence were simply acting as the Loyal Opposition, not enablers of what will, in due time, impeachment or not, prison or not, prove to be the greatest swindle by an elected official in American history.

Nobody with even the Scarecrow’s brain would doubt what has been perpetrated on us dumb citizens. All the lies, all the braggadocio, all the emoluments, all the Donald kids selling their own brands, all the conflicts of interest, all the affairs and their cover-ups, all the attacks on any and all who dare to pull back the Wizard’s curtain, all the abject ignorance, all the tax schemes, all of it day after day, brazen and blatant, what kind of traitor to American values would defend this?

Plenty, it turns out. Most of the Loyal Opposition, it would appear. When Trump famously bragged he could shoot someone in the middle of 5th Avenue and get away with it, well, he was right. If you wonder how tyrants become dictators, you’re getting a civics lesson every day. They don’t take over with a coup, they take over inch by inch with the blessing of the people who benefit from his policies. And the population who like a ‘strong man’, the kind of man who embodies their own fears and prejudices, who isn’t afraid to attack the weak, the poor, the different, the ‘others’. They don’t realize yet that he will eventually attack them. He’ll make them the poor and the weak. He’ll put a boot on their neck too.

If you think the America you studied in high school history class is a country where democratic ideals will triumph over corruption and demagoguery, you’re getting a daily dose of reality. The Trump Brand is about one man. He’s ignorant and obnoxious and let’s face it, he’s popular. He’s selling himself and if he has to sell out the country, no big deal. If you’re not frightened by this yet, you should be. If you thought the Mueller Report would put an end to this reign of ignorance and greed, you thought wrong. Half of Congress turned a blind eye. Most of the ‘base’ did too. Something has turned putrid in the body politic and we’re close to becoming a country we never thought possible.

The Trump Brand, when the smoke clears and the mirrors are broken, will be a sad chapter in American History. This is the face of capitalism run amok, brakes out, no regulations, no boundaries. This is unchecked greed. Its name is Trump.

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Maybe we get too much news these days. All of these days, 24/7. All the news fit to tweet. Used to be we just listened to the local gossip over at Tyee Store, find out whose kid was on meth, what daughter was pregnant, whose house was broken into, all the stuff we passed on neighbor to neighbor. Now we’re privy to the goings-on of the Kardashians and R. Kelly. I couldn’t pick any of them out of a line-up, but they sure have name recognition in my news feeds.

Today I was scrolling around the internet, stepping through the cowpie landmines of the Trump Investigations, what promises to be an endless overload of subpoenas, accusations, testimonies, pledges of immunity, conspiracies, denials and … well, you know, the Trump Show — and came across a spat between the Republicans’ newest favorite Satan, Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, the liberal representative from New York. I figure they must be worried about her greatly, maybe thinking in 6 years she’ll be old enough to run for President so why not start a Hillary-style smear early enough to derail her if she does. The kid barely got sworn in and already she’s a boogie man, even got her own acronym, AOC.

AOC put out a position paper calling for a New Green Deal. Or a Green New Deal. Something like that. Bundled up climate change with income inequality and scared the bejeezus out of the conservatives. Jerry Falwell’s kid, J.F. Junior, called her stupid and a liar, then invited her to speak at his bastion of evangelical purity, Liberty College, his Dad’s madrasa, a school so right wing it booted out the College Democrats, “a club whose parent organization stands against the moral principles held by Liberty University.” Tough standards, J.F.

Turns out that when AOC mentioned cutting back on meat production, cows being a major source of methane gas release, Jerry Junior took major umbrage. He’s got a herd of the farting beasts. “I’ve got a hundred cows. You just let Alexandria Cortez show up at my house and try to take my cows away,” the meat-eating man of God warned. Apparently Jerry J. is auditioning to replace Charlton Heston as Moses. That, or the lead in Planet of the Cows.

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While we’re all in the mood for rewriting history, let’s revisit that claim from Michael Cohen that Trump falsified his bone spurs to avoid the Viet Nam draft. He wasn’t, the Donald told Mike, stupid. Okay, let’s not debate that point again. If he claims he’s got a very high IQ, very high, maybe one of the highest ever,let’s keep it in mind and move along. With apologies to Albert Einstein….

You probably saw the photo of him hugging the American flag the way he might hug Stormy Daniels, you know, before the hush money, so I ask you, does that look like the portrait of a draft dodger? No, in case you didn’t know, the man just came back from … that’s right, Viet Nam. Hanoi, in fact. North Viet Nam. John Kerry, that phony silver star recipient, never made it to Hanoi, now did he? Just mucked around the rivers in his gunboat pretending to be a hero so years later he could run for President like he was some Jack Kennedy on P.T. 109. And of course Jack probably faked his heroism too.

But Donald made it up the Ho Chi Minh Trail all the way to the capitol, now named after the little commie. Flew in bone spurs and all as Commander-in-Chief so you tell me if that sounds like a draft dodger or does it sound like a Viet Nam vet? Maybe it sounds more like a hero, you stop and think about it. He dined with Little Rocket Man, barely anyone there to protect him, and you didn’t hear him complain about bone spurs once, not once! It may not qualify him for a purple heart, but the silver star, someone should put his name forward. The man’s bravery was on view, bro!

When I think of heroism, first guy that comes to mind is you-know-who. Okay, he has other folks fire his people, not really liking that confrontational stuff. I mean, it’s not a TV show now, it’s the real thing and who needs some apprentice shouting back when he’s let go? And yeah, the man had a ‘fixer’ to handle the rough stuff, the threats of lawsuits when workers didn’t get their pay, but sometimes heroes delegate. Doesn’t mean they’re afraid. Doesn’t mean that at all.

John McCain spent years in a North Vietnamese prison and like Donald pointed out, how does that make him a hero? Heroes don’t get taken prisoner! Heroes are winners! Donald Trump flew out of North Korea on Air Force One. You tell me who’s the hero. Maybe the biggest hero of all time, the stuff of legend. A genius AND a hero. Roll the cameras.

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In the Land of Equal Opportunity we all love a good success story, a pull-yourself-up-from-the bottom mythology, a rags-to-riches saga ready made for Netflix. Something to give hope to those without, dreams for the downtrodden, possibilities for the impoverished. Thank god for the Trumps! All you need to rise to the top in America is, well, frankly, to be born at the top. The Donald claims to be a self-made man, a brilliant deal-maker, a real estate developer without parallel. You could do the same … if you had a brain as big as his.

It should give us all hope. Start out with a few measly millions and you too could parlay that into even more millions. In fact you could do pretty well just investing in Treasury bonds and sitting back while the interest accrues year after compounding year. Try that with a car payment, rent due and a job that pays minimum wage. A job that year after year makes less as inflation eats up your earnings.

It’s a pretty myth, the bootstrap, Horation Alger story. Too bad it’s bogus. Check the ranking of America in the world when it comes to rising up in income. Sort of like checking our rank in health care. Or education. We can crow that we’re #1 but only if you don’t bother checking the statistics. What we’re #1 at is creating billionaires. The rest of you, good luck. Play the Lottery, pal, but if you think you’re going to start down near the bottom and end up with your very own Trump Tower, well, dream on if it gives you hope.

Ivanka thinks the poor should eat cake. Or Big Macs. She thinks socialism will kill the American Dream. She thinks she’s the poster babe for hard work and earned success. The rest of the folks who talk about raising minimum wage obviously want a free handout. If they could, they’d take welfare instead. Marie Antoinette couldn’t have said it better. The mobs are lazy, the mobs deserve what they get. The mobs just don’t have what it takes to be successful. On that last point, I have to agree.

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