The Taxman

Just about when I finished our federal taxes … for the third time … I come across an article listing 60 large corporations that pay no tax whatsoever. Maybe you remember the whining and moaning awhile back that American corporations pay too much compared to other countries’ taxes. Maybe you even believed it. If so, all I can say is that your taxes are simple: put down what you earned, take your standard deduction, sign the form and send a check or wait for a refund. You probably figure corporations do the same thing. Put down their earnings, deduct their cost of doing bizness, that’s the profit, divide by 40% or whatever it used to be and lick their wounds and their stamp.

Tax laws are complicated. There are more loopholes in there than I have mice in my shack. If you ever wondered what lobbyists do to earn their salaries, spend a few hours looking through the IRS list of forms. There are quite a few. If you have a few days, scroll through a couple of them, maybe try to follow the worktables, see how they work. I guarantee you need to be a pretty good accountant. And if you’re a corporate accountant, I guarantee you’ll take every deduction you’re allowed plus plenty that are, well, arguable. Since audits are pretty much a thing of the past, you won’t have to make an argument, just breathe easy. And if in the end you don’t have to pay taxes, well, as a taxpayer who does, I’m just glad we aren’t sending these overtaxed corporations refund checks for all their bother.

Oh, wait, maybe we are. Allowances for next year’s taxes, carry-overs, tax exemptions for simply moving to our town, the list is long and depressing. Sure wouldn’t want them to feel disadvantaged, I know, but there is something inherently wrong with a company like Amazon paying zero taxes, then wrangling concessions from their new headquarter’s location, all the while using predatory tactics on their competition. The average of all corporations in 2018 for tax on their profits was, get ready, 7%. No wonder the corporations are crying bloody murder. 7%. Yeow, owww. Little doubt there why wages aren’t going up when these overtaxed companies can barely stay afloat under such fiscal onslaught. Over regulated, over taxed, overseas and over the rainbow. Why should I complain if I pay more than them? Just helping out the economy. So what if Amazon, Delta, Chevron, Netflix, Duke Energy, Honeywell, Occidental Petroleum, John Deere, General Motors and about 50 more large firms couldn’t chip in a dime? Little bizzy making profits for their shareholders, hey. Me, on the other hand, not too many shareholders in my company.

So once again, another fiscal year, another check to the IRS that pays my fair share of schools, fire and police, roads, welfare, the military, infrastructure, border walls, national forests and parks, all those things government does that make my life easier and richer. Corporations? Not so much. Good citizens? I don’t think so. The right to give money to political action committees just like the rest of us humans? You tell me….

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3 Responses to “The Taxman”

  1. Rick Says:

    Out here in Hawaii, we have no corporate headquarters in my district. We’re fortunate a few stores remain open for business. The residents live on the downhill side of lava flows, and on the lower slopes of the income curve. If we have any one percenters, it’s the bottom one percenters.

    A recent news report reavealed those living here are also the most likely recipients of a tax audit. The red flag in our 1040’s? The Head of Household deduction. An unmarried taxpayer with dependents, responsible for the financial upkeep of a home is where tax auditors think the big money is underreported.

    Maybe that’s why the federal budget runs at a deficit?

  2. skeeter Says:

    Now that Trump has figured out that Hawaii is a state, not quite the same as Puerto Rico, he probably figures the IRS can milk you freeloaders now that he’s pinpointed you on a map. No need to investigate or audit large corporations, they regulate themselves, save a few bucks on IRS auditors and FAA regulators. It all comes out in the whitewash. If you were a canny biznessman, you’d waltz into Hilo and demand tax relief in the 6 figures, otherwise you’re moving to Maui where they appreciate a corporation that employs (potentially) hundreds of well paid citizens. Do like FoxConn and promise the moon, then argue that economic times dictate a bit of downsizing. Boeing immediately outsourced jobs to Carolina. Gotta be a tough negotiator. Like the President. Get that tax credit in writing, is my advice. The bizness of America is bizness, tell em. And the bizness of Hawaii is no different.

  3. Rick Says:

    Good idea!
    Perhaps I can nudge the approval process along if I agree I’ll only hire Head of Households – – then tag employee W-2 forms for the Department of Taxation. When my workers file their 1040’s, Big Gov can pounce and rake in the loot. I’ll give Jeff Bezos a call, he probably has a system for that already in place. If you can’t tax the corporation or the CEO, the money has to come from somewhere, right?

    When Leona Helmsley said “only the little people pay taxes,” she must have meant children living with Head of Household tax filers.

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