south end uprising
Some of the boyz at the South End Diner got wind the other day that their cellphone company was going to start charging them a $2 a month service fee to pay their bills online or by check if they didn’t go to an auto pay plan. Coffee cups got pounded on the formica and obscenities got hurled until finally Brenda Bodice, our waitress, said enough was enough. ‘You break them mugs, you’ll pay more’n two dollars.’ Mabana Mike said it reminded him of that $5 fee Bank of Stanwood wanted when he used his debit card and Tyee Tom said he’d texted til his fingers bled to everybody he knew ‘HELL NO’ and they’d stopped B of S in their greedy little dollar pinching tracks, hadn’t they? These are heady times down here on the digital South End, I guess. The boyz are het up and frisky fingered now. Jim Bob pushed his plate of half eaten chicken fried steak into the center of the warzone and declared he was taking his grievance directly to Facebook. ‘This will not stand!!’ he repeated again and again until Brenda had to come over and tell him to quit his shouting. ‘You’re upsettin the kids,’ she said and sure enough, Milly’s juvenile delinquents were starting to work themselves into a sugar tantrum. The whole diner was heating up, near as I could tell. Thank God it wasn’t noon yet and the boyz were commencing cocktail hour …. Things would’ve gone more than Viral. After all, this was the South End and the boyz weren’t going to stand for tyranny, for economic two buck waterboarding, for corporate hands reaching into their pockets, no sir. They’d reached a limit. Wars, subprime housing busts, economic collapse, gridlocked Congress, slashed education budgets, discontinued social services, okay, but not another damn dime for Verizon. THIS WILL NOT STAND! Libya and Tunisia got nothing on Camano. All I can say is cable TV better not try anything cute with rate hikes this spring. The boyz are social networking guerrillas. The boyz are empowered. And the boyz are fed up. Democracy — or at least coupons and price reductions — will be coming to the USA if they got any say in it. Money to the people!
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