Capitalism in a Nutshell

 

 

Capitalism succeeds because it combines two primary drives in the human brain: greed and the urge NOT to work for someone else.  On the South End most of us tried our hands at employment but came up a little short.  Short of a work ethic, short of money, short of tolerance for a Boss.  So we did what most desperate, unemployed people do.  We started our own business.

Any good STARTING YOUR OWN CORPORATION FOR THE COMPLETE IDIOT book will tell you under-capitalization is the main harbinger of Failure in 90% of startups.  Obviously none of us down here bought the book, probably couldn’t afford it.  “It takes money to make money.”  Page 2, Chapter 1.  Folks just figure, I guess, they’ll buy a couple of yaks, breed em, then sell the little yaksters to a clamoring public.  They don’t really factor in the yak feed, the vet bills, the yak barn and the yak fences.  And they NEVER factor in the publicity campaign to create a viral fever for WANTING  or NEEDING a yak.  Maybe many yaks.

The other thing they don’t calculate in is how much work self-employment entails.  Without overtime.  Without benefits.  You’re supposed to trade off working for Cap’n. Bligh in return for slaving 80 hours a week for Mr. Wonderful, yourself.  Course Mr. Wonderful isn’t issuing paychecks at the beginning.  He has yak bills to pay before he pays himself and the debts are growing deeper than yak droppings out in the barnyard.

So it’s little wonder us entrepreneur types, us Job Creators, us Captains of Industry, end up broke, disillusioned and depressed, our dreams shattered, our shacks mortgaged, our divorce rates sky high.

But!  By god, we’re South Enders and South Enders don’t quit!  Well, okay, we gave up on our capitalist fantasies of entrepreneurial riches.  But we stayed true to our vow never to work for the Man again, never to be a cog in the well-greased machinery of some #@*&!!^# company, no sir!  If we have to live poor, so be it.  If we have to live by our wits, even if that’s a SERIOUS disadvantage, okay.  And if anyone out there is looking for a very nice herd of cute yaks, I think we can help you with YOUR dream.

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