Introduction (not given) at the Democratic Fundraiser Last Night
Some of you radical leftists out here tonight maybe remember the good old days when the Owl Party ran candidates for public office every year. Weird policy statements in the voter pamphlet, strange photos, a real hoot, no pun intended. I’ve been spending some quality time reading our local Island County pamphlet. Gotta say, I miss those Owl Party chuckleheads … but … we got plenty of humor anyway if you bother to read these.
I’d like to say the funnier ones are always the Independents, The America First Party Republicans, The Maga Republican Party, The Trump Republican Party, my favorite the JFK Republican Party, but we got plenty of Democratic howlers too. One fellow, running for U.S. Senator, claims that bitcoin will fix our broken monetary system and quote provide relief from the failing US dollar. He advocates privacy, individual sovereignty, and private property. ‘In summary,’ he wrote, ‘Bitcoin’. Kinda like that scene in The Graduate where Dustin Hoffman gets a one word tip on the future. Plastic. Bitcoin? I suspect that was written before cryptocurrencies’ bottoms dropped out and the US dollar reached parity with the euro.
But I’m not here to disparage folks running for public office. We got plenty of Americans who do that every day — and I’m not just talking about Fox News. All of these folks in politics, even the certifiably crazy ones, are willing to throw their hats in the ring out of some sense of patriotic obligation. And sure, some are there to protect their own self interests, maybe help the rich get a little richer, but some are genuinely wanting to make government work better, lift up the underprivileged, advocate for the homeless, make our health care system work for all of us, provide social services along with better roads and adequate police departments. Their political statements won’t make you laugh, but they do provide food for thought. Janet St. Clair’s reiterates what she’s been doing the past four years and what she’d like to keep doing the next four years. Personally, I’m glad to hear someone speak up for the homeless and the underprivileged, the poor and the sick. I think maybe the rich will do okay, they’ll do just fine.
Tip O’Neill, Speaker of the House for ten years in the 70’s and 80’s, famously said all politics are local. I guess Tip never dreamed of the Internet, never imagined Facebook and Twitter, never heard Hot Talk Radio or watched Fox News and the likes of Tucker Carlson. In the time since he was Speaker the world has shrunk to the size of the South End, all local politics are nationalized, globalized and shrink wrapped to fit in an Amazon drone delivery.
When Karla Jacks was running for commissioner, her opponent and his trolls accused her of planning to shut down the Navy Base on Whidbey. That opponent is still running to save Alt Field from you radical leftists. Commissioners in Island County are powerful people apparently. But not even Janet has managed to override the Navy and the U.S. government. Probably just needs another term in office. I say we give it to her. Like the rich, I think NAS Whidbey will do okay.
Janet St. Clair, ladies and gentlemen, and you antifa too….
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