The Death of Gutenberg
I got a couple of cronies who still write letters, which I return religiously, but the truth is, most of my correspondence these days is by e-mail. Tells you my age right there. The folks younger than me, they look at e-mail almost like snail mail. Too wordy, too long, too damn much trouble when you can text message.
For the longest time I thought a lot of my digital pen-pals were entering senility or onset Alzheimers. Their spelling got terrible, the syntax was lost, the punctuation became perfunctory. That, or they only send e-mails when they’re drunk or on drugs or not fully caffeinated. Or, knowing half my cronies, all of the above…. It took me a couple of years to discover they were treating e-mails like text messages.
I majored in English in college. Even taught it for a short time. Literature, communication skills, language — call me old fashioned and wheel me out for Nathaniel Hawthorne Day, but I still think these are useful skills. I was in town today, bantering with a friend in a shared language, English, and we still had a misunderstanding. Imagine two people trying to communicate with separate linguistics. Kind of like a native Utsaladian asking directions down here for the South End Diner. Good luck, Sven! Probably end up at the Marina ordering lutefisk. Possibly tragic consequences.
Lately I’ve been noticing that responses to my e-mails are, well …. Let’s be kind here … it’s as if they only read the first sentence. I’m realizing all my literary endeavors are completely wasted. AND, worse! They’re just so much extraneous clutter for my recipient. They’re not going to read anything longer than a Tweet now. Anything more, I don’t care if it’s Pulitzer Worthy, it’s instant trash. If I got something Important to say, better just SAY it. Folks are a little too busy for floral accoutrements, literary flourishes, or artistic embellishments. Which, now that I think of it, means most of you readers abandoned me back in the first paragraph.
Well, okay. I just re-read the first paragraph. Too wordy. Too long. Too damn much trouble when you can text message. Here’s the tip of the day: hit DELETE. If you haven’t already…..