The Skeeter Daddle Diaries

Who doesn’t love a good pandemic? Now that Covid has receded into our collective past of plagues, we’re treated to the guessing game of which disease is waiting in the wings.  Will it be monkeypox that sprints ahead or the avian flu?  How about polio, that creepy little virus from the past, emerging once again in municipal water systems? SARS? Ever heard of Langya virus?  Get ready, it’s about to go viral, at least in the news.  West Nile?  MERS?  HIV-AIDS?  E-bola scare ya?

They tell me there are more viruses on this planet than there are stars in the universe.  That’s a boatload of potential pathogens, all mutating like mad in a changing climate, most benign but it only takes one, right, to make your life a living flesh eating hell.  We all enjoy a good horror story, I guess, but lately the scares are real, end of the world kind of unhappy endings.  We’re all waiting expectantly for the Green Plague, stepchild of the Black One which killed off a goodly portion of the human inhabitants here on Earth.  You know, the planet we’re trapped on.  Bolt the doors, don the masks, immunize yerself!  The pestilence is coming, the pestilence is coming!

Out there in the jungle, here in the barnyards, down in the municipal water system, the little buggers are watching and waiting for their chance.  Maybe they’re coming in from all those rockets returning from outer space, alien bacteria and viruses and bugs, oh no!  What chance do we earthlings have against intergalactic plague?  None, I’m betting.  No N-95 hepa mask is going to save you, kiddo, not a hope in hell.  The monkeys spread it.  Bats.  Those Chinese labs.  The CIA experiments gone sideways.  Who you gonna call?  Doc Fauci?  Half the country thinks Doc Fauci made a fortune off Covid.  If you can’t trust your doctor, who can you trust?  Tucker Carlson? If you don’t believe in science, what chance do you have to survive the next pandemic?  Count on this: calling it a phony political plague won’t keep you immune.  That kind of superstition didn’t work in the Middle Ages and it won’t work for the next Black Plague.  The bugs are real.

But … on the bright side, at least the news media has something else to scare us with besides politics and war.  Lucky us.

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