The Skeeter Daddle Diaries

Jason Rasmussen owns Camano Plumbing and advertises in the phone book listings with a subheading that reads: “We Fix Your Do-It-Yourself Mistakes”. Back when we were both newbies to the island and D-I-Y guyz ourselves, Jason eventually decided all his mistakes added up to on-the-job training, practically an advanced degree in plumbingology and to some degree, but not an accredited one, I suppose he was his own apprentice over the years. My suspicion is that when he built his house and plumbed it himself, he figured the time was right for an entrepreneurial act of courage.

Plumbing, I will attest, is not a trade for the weak of heart. The gods of plumbing are cruel and implacable. They set traps for the faint of heart, ruin marriages, corrode confidence and turn what might seem an easy project into endless warfare. Jason, apparently, even after ruptured pipes, plugged toilets and ruined dishwashers destroyed by dropped silverware, has steeled himself for the battle. He is the Galahad that will slay the dragon that you, the unprepared D-I-Y homeowner who thought installing a sink faucet would be child’s play, instead came face to face, tooth to tooth, claw to claw with nothing you could ever have imagined. A few days without running water and multiple trips to the nearest hardware store, the disgusted looks from the woman who no longer loves you, sure, it’s maybe time to call Jason at Camano Plumbing. At this point Jason will tell me (but not you) money is no object. What matters is returning again to what was once Civilization. Running water, hot and cold, toilets that flush, indoor plumbing, sinks that drain, all those ‘conveniences’ that are not conveniences, they’re necessities.

Over a few beers at the Pilot Lounge, Jason will confess that he’s still basically training on the job. “Plumbing’s a bitch,” (his unofficial subheading), he’ll confess, “but at least now when I screw up, I get to charge the customer.” I laugh, order another round and always say I should’ve gone into the trades. “Always room for competition,” he invariably replies. “Just another screw-up I can fix.” Sadly, I know it’s true.