The Skeeter Daddle Diaries

Well okay, that Big Red Wave for the Republicans came in with a little less than what they’d hoped for, no doubt figuring Sleepy Joe’s age and world inflation would be all they’d need for a wipeout victory.  Maybe total negativity isn’t the best message for the voters.  But what are ya gonna do?  After all, tax cuts for the rich probably aren’t going to slow down inflation.  When bread prices go through the roof, telling em to eat cake won’t fly either.

Where we sit right now, the Senate is a toss-up.  If Nevada drops in the Dem category, game over.  If it flips red, we got ourselves another Georgia finish.  A reverend vs. a football hero.  Tough choice down there in the Peach State.  Herschel is carrying a lot of baggage, even for a big running back.  Doesn’t like abortions but paid for two of his out-of-wedlock sweethearts to have one.  Then lied about it.  Claims we can push that bad Chinese air back where it came from and solve pollution woes.  Asks why we want any more trees.

You probably don’t expect football stars to be Rhodes scholars too, but maybe they should be smarter than this guy.  And maybe morality should count too.  Especially if you’re the party of family values.  The hair on fire boyz are rallying like dumpy old cheerleaders for Walker, exhorting the crackers to get their redneck asses out to vote, the fate of America is on the scrimmage line.  Me, I think this is the ultimate irony for the GOP.  A candidate with no solutions, no real ideas, no telling how he got to be the spotlight for the entire country to parse and analyze.  I wouldn’t want to be Herschel right now, no way.

And if I thought bozos like Lindsay Graham or Newt Gingrich were going to save the day, maybe block those 300 pound gorillas on the front line, holy pigskin, Fatman, I’d be wishing I was back with a couple of my sweethearts, promising to use protection this time.  But you never know in the Yew Ess Aye these happy days what the ending to this election might be.  Walker is Trump’s pick and so I expect he’ll have to go up to Georgia, give his usual stump pitch whether the Republicans like it or not.  Poor Herschel, damned if Trump does, damned if he doesn’t.  Why can’t life be as simple as football?

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Just before Election Day a major blow hit our area, knocking out power, internet, phones and most remnants of what we like to call civilization.  Five days later, yesterday, the power came back on and we could get the dreaded election results we’d missed.  You know and I know and so does Q that this was no coincidence, this blackout, just another conspiracy to rig the polls while some of us could do no watching, not while we were struggling to stay warm, forage for unspoiled food, haul water and help the neighbors who didn’t have generators whining 24/7 for 120 straight hours.  Who could possibly know what tampering was at play down at the ballot boxes.  Or what last minute Dirty Tricks were being conducted in the electron darkness.

We fully expected the power might never return.  Possibly the entire country was cast into the Bronze Age, the coup Trump had planned for Jan. 6^th nearly two years ago might have taken place, the country might have declared martial law and the Proud Boys possibly confirmed to sit on the bench of the Supreme Court.  The Storm Qanon had predicted had manifested while we were occupied with surviving, little knowing the real occupation had arrived.  The Red Tsunami had swept away democracy as we once knew it.

But … as is usual, paranoia might have some basis in reality, just not most of it.  Our state, Washington state, ‘woke’ that it is, remained mostly blue.  Florida, well, there was your tsunami, with a hurricane close on its heels, headed right at Mar-a-Lago, another embarrassment for the President-in-Exile who refused to heed evacuation notices.  The Red Wave, the one predicted by nearly all the pollsters and pundits, washed weakly to shore.  As of right now, the House looks like it will go red, the Senate, probably a repeat of the Georgia vote, the state that will determine the majority.  From where I sit, power on, lights aplenty, water running, refrigerators working, internet back, phone working … I feel like we dodged some bullets.

If the women who voted based on abortion rights or the kids who voted to save the planet, I thank you.  If you were the dickwad who voted for Dr. Oz or thought De Sanctimonious was the answer to inflation or the Ukrainian war, hello, the country hasn’t gone totally batshit crazy.  Just yet.  Return to your idiot newsfeeds and hope to god your power doesn’t go out for five days.  Stuck with your own fantasies and conspiracy theories, you won’t make it.  Bolt the doors, load your AR-15’s, listen for the zombie apocalypse coming for you.  Exactly what you feared….

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