The Skeeter Daddle Diaries

In the latest White House revolving door, here’s yer hat, what’s yer hurry? incident, President Trump announced that he was replacing his vice president, Mike Pence with Fox News analyst Sean Hannity. “I watch Sean all the time and I have to say, the man is brilliant. He agrees with me 99% of the time.” When asked how an elected official such as the Vice President could be legally and constitutionally fired, Mr. Trump stated that his stable of lawyers had assured him he was the President and could do whatever he wanted. “I want Sean Hannity,” the Commander-in-Chief declared. “I don’t want a yes man, I want a Hell Yes! Man.”

Following on the heels of the President’s hiring of John Bolton as National Security Advisor and Larry Kudlow as economic advisor, both Fox commentators, as well as a few others from the Fox network in lesser roles, the White House team now looks more and more like it’s finally Fair and Balanced. The President feels comfortable with his new inner sanctum and rumors abound that the purging of the first year’s cabinet has only just begun. Fox News is scrambling to fill its vacant seats by hiring interns straight out of high school, primarily students who refused to march against the NRA gun lobby. Unfortunately there aren’t as many as there are vacancies.

Team Trump, aka Faux Fox, seems positioned to reinvent government and while not entirely fulfilling campaign promises to ‘drain the swamp’ of D.C., they certainly are poised to tip the ship of state and sail on without the original crew of what are now seen as Deep Staters. The S.S. Donald is steaming full speed ahead into turbulent international waters, manned by Fox sycophants and psycho-rants who happily applaud the captain in his search for white whales and beached bikini models. Network ratings are through the roof, the Skipper exulted. ‘Like nothing before. And you ain’t seen nothing yet.” Where oh where is Gilligan when we need him?

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